Easily, anger and bitterness could flare within when I realized that I have been walking down the exact same road leading no where. I can worry, I can question God's will, wonder through sleepless nights and heartache days, and walk around secluding myself from the world but where would that leave me. Still on the outside looking in. I walk away not with anger but with excitement knowing that the next step in Gods plan is more perfect than I could ever imagine. It hurts but only to an extent. Not that it didn't mean much. It meant a lot. More than I wish to admit, but still I see a blessing lying in the works. This was a stepping stone to something greater. Something I may not understand until that time comes and I look back and realize that I finally found the right road to journey on. I'll look back and realize that I walked through consecutive open doors. Doors that had been unlocked the entire time. I was just trying to open a door that was shut. Beyond today lies a tomorrow of promises obtained, prayers answered, dreams come true. I will walk through a new door. Closing the recent one with one last sigh. I'll turn around. Breathe in. Breathe out. Crooked grin. Move on
Ain't nothing like walking in steps ordered by the Lord.
Psalms 37:23
Monday, May 9, 2011
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Aint Nobody Like Jesus
Who knew that when I would wake up this morning after a much needed sleep following Youth Retreat and six Holy Ghost filled services, that today would be the day that God would set up the beginning of the greatest life changing blessings that have prayed about for years.
So on our way to the freeway to drop off mom and than go to school, our car completely died on us. So I and some random thoughtful guy pushed the car into our apartments and I walked a two miles with mom to the bus stop so she could go to work. I go to Fry's to get food for dinner and than Target to shop for new bedroom stuff and I got a call that would cause people to fret, to worry, to fall apart.
Mom got fired.
Maybe anyone else would. But after I hung up with mom the first words out of my mouth right there in Fry's was "thank you Jesus!"
Dont understand why?
Its simple. You can read in so many places in the Bible where God promises to never let his children go through something without being right there with them. We also read that God doesnt close a door without opeing another.
God put something inside of me a few months back. He made my faith grow to levels that I could never ever imagine. To the point that when I talk to people about what I believe that God is going to do, I am called a dreamer, living in the fantasy world.
Maybe. But I say maybe not.
God has given me so many promises. Promises about healing that I have waited on for over eight years. Promises of financial stability to be a blessing to those without, those in need, and those who have been a blessing along with family, church, and my own personal life. Promises of possessions that I have effectively and fervently prayed for. Promises about her and his blessing upon her and I.
See, Mom didnt really like this job cause she wasnt really doing anything challenging and got yelled at and wrongfully accused alot. Taking a step back to contemplate the reason why she was there than, mom and I begin to see God unfold the rose. He was reaching out for a lady name Tanya who since than has come to church twice and twice has been deeply touched by God.
God put something financial in my mind a few months back and as I began to see problems build up for mom, a thought crossed my mind. If God took away the primary means of supporting ourselves, than he did so to make room for His perfect promise that is on its way.
A goofy smile (bigger than the one that is on my face when I think about her which is pretty big) came across my face when Mom told me what happened cause I Couldnt help but think that this is it. The answers to the prayers that we prayed for years upon years has finally arrived.
As I walked to the church house to thank God and also to pray that he would give us the right mind, heart and spirit to use these blessings for His kingdom and glory, I begin to think of the many sermons that I have heard over the last month. And how they have built up upon each other more and more each time. Sermons about faith. Sermons about remembering where God brought you from and how good he has been. Sermons about the power of consistant and persistant prayers. Sermons about guarding your heart and life and making sure that what you let in is the right thing. Sermons about receiving the promises of God in the miracle church house that God blessed us with. And all these sermons and promises straight from God has built up my faith to high levels and so when I look at the things that happen like mom losing her job on the same day that my car, the only transportation we have to get us to Glendale daily, I cant help but smile and thank God that he not only promises but he is faithful to perform.
Man I love this life. Aint nothing better than being in love with Jesus. Than feeling His Spirit and presence. Than having joy and peace and love and someone that is there through it all, good and bad.
I dont understand why anyone would want to leave or reject this life.
Stay tuned while I begin to post the many blessings that Jesus is going to provide today and the very near days to come.
"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them that are the called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28)
So on our way to the freeway to drop off mom and than go to school, our car completely died on us. So I and some random thoughtful guy pushed the car into our apartments and I walked a two miles with mom to the bus stop so she could go to work. I go to Fry's to get food for dinner and than Target to shop for new bedroom stuff and I got a call that would cause people to fret, to worry, to fall apart.
Mom got fired.
Maybe anyone else would. But after I hung up with mom the first words out of my mouth right there in Fry's was "thank you Jesus!"
Dont understand why?
Its simple. You can read in so many places in the Bible where God promises to never let his children go through something without being right there with them. We also read that God doesnt close a door without opeing another.
God put something inside of me a few months back. He made my faith grow to levels that I could never ever imagine. To the point that when I talk to people about what I believe that God is going to do, I am called a dreamer, living in the fantasy world.
Maybe. But I say maybe not.
God has given me so many promises. Promises about healing that I have waited on for over eight years. Promises of financial stability to be a blessing to those without, those in need, and those who have been a blessing along with family, church, and my own personal life. Promises of possessions that I have effectively and fervently prayed for. Promises about her and his blessing upon her and I.
See, Mom didnt really like this job cause she wasnt really doing anything challenging and got yelled at and wrongfully accused alot. Taking a step back to contemplate the reason why she was there than, mom and I begin to see God unfold the rose. He was reaching out for a lady name Tanya who since than has come to church twice and twice has been deeply touched by God.
God put something financial in my mind a few months back and as I began to see problems build up for mom, a thought crossed my mind. If God took away the primary means of supporting ourselves, than he did so to make room for His perfect promise that is on its way.
A goofy smile (bigger than the one that is on my face when I think about her which is pretty big) came across my face when Mom told me what happened cause I Couldnt help but think that this is it. The answers to the prayers that we prayed for years upon years has finally arrived.
As I walked to the church house to thank God and also to pray that he would give us the right mind, heart and spirit to use these blessings for His kingdom and glory, I begin to think of the many sermons that I have heard over the last month. And how they have built up upon each other more and more each time. Sermons about faith. Sermons about remembering where God brought you from and how good he has been. Sermons about the power of consistant and persistant prayers. Sermons about guarding your heart and life and making sure that what you let in is the right thing. Sermons about receiving the promises of God in the miracle church house that God blessed us with. And all these sermons and promises straight from God has built up my faith to high levels and so when I look at the things that happen like mom losing her job on the same day that my car, the only transportation we have to get us to Glendale daily, I cant help but smile and thank God that he not only promises but he is faithful to perform.
Man I love this life. Aint nothing better than being in love with Jesus. Than feeling His Spirit and presence. Than having joy and peace and love and someone that is there through it all, good and bad.
I dont understand why anyone would want to leave or reject this life.
Stay tuned while I begin to post the many blessings that Jesus is going to provide today and the very near days to come.
"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them that are the called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28)
Sunday, December 19, 2010
21st Birthday To Remember. Eternal Blessing
Tuesday Night, December 14, 2010: Spirit of God moves in a way so strong that leads to tongues of interpretation.
Sunday Morning, December 19, 2010: Spirit of God still lingers from the previous service. Victory is claimed. Dad comes to church for the first time in years. Last time he was in church, he was pastoring and preaching that day. Pre service prayer takes place and from the very outset of service, God's presence is made known and is strong. Pre service prayer leads to everyone making their way around the alter and praying. Tears flowing, prayers being prayed, victory and deliverance over spirits proclaimed. Dad makes his way to the alter where sin dies and grace and mercy are restored. Pastor points to dad prayer at the alter and I go and pray with him. Power of God hits so strong that I cannot stand after a while. Tears flowing, Holy Ghost being spoken, I hear the sound of the greatest birthday gift I can receive today or any other day.
Dad speaking in tongues.
Every tear that stained my pillow, every cry of my heart, every week of fast, everything given up to draw closer to God both great and small, significant and trivial, everyday, everytime, everywhere, all was worth it for that moment.
There is nobody like Jesus.
O give thanks unto the LORD; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever. O give thanks unto the God of gods: for his mercy endureth for ever. O give thanks to the Lord of lords: for his mercy endureth for ever. To him who alone doeth great wonders: for his mercy endureth for ever. Psalms 136:1-4
Sunday Morning, December 19, 2010: Spirit of God still lingers from the previous service. Victory is claimed. Dad comes to church for the first time in years. Last time he was in church, he was pastoring and preaching that day. Pre service prayer takes place and from the very outset of service, God's presence is made known and is strong. Pre service prayer leads to everyone making their way around the alter and praying. Tears flowing, prayers being prayed, victory and deliverance over spirits proclaimed. Dad makes his way to the alter where sin dies and grace and mercy are restored. Pastor points to dad prayer at the alter and I go and pray with him. Power of God hits so strong that I cannot stand after a while. Tears flowing, Holy Ghost being spoken, I hear the sound of the greatest birthday gift I can receive today or any other day.
Dad speaking in tongues.
Every tear that stained my pillow, every cry of my heart, every week of fast, everything given up to draw closer to God both great and small, significant and trivial, everyday, everytime, everywhere, all was worth it for that moment.
There is nobody like Jesus.
O give thanks unto the LORD; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever. O give thanks unto the God of gods: for his mercy endureth for ever. O give thanks to the Lord of lords: for his mercy endureth for ever. To him who alone doeth great wonders: for his mercy endureth for ever. Psalms 136:1-4
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
rambleblabbleramble
Wow. Its hard to believe that in eleven days I am going to be 21. Thank you God for mercy, grace, healing and salvation just in time. Usually this is the part where people begin to talk about how they are getting old with a dreadful tone of voice. I , on the other hand, don't share that feeling. Sure I am a whole lot older than 21 inside. Going through the type of life that I have been through because of choices I or another person in my life have made, does that to a person. Although I look at my life with a sense of hope of much more to come. Blessings, miracles, earthly gain and of course the ultimate reward, eternal life with my Father. Not to boast, but I speak now with a faith that is impossible to explain. The amount of hope and faith that I have in the prayers that I have been praying being answered is so great. It's like this. You order something online and the shipping takes two weeks to get in. The day that it gets in, the UPS man comes to your door and you're not home that day. So they leave you a note and tell you to pick it up at the nearest UPS Store. That's how I feel about these memorial prayers (Prayers that take a little more time vs an immediate response to a prayer) Like I have prayed (ordered) this prayer and God has told me to wait a bit for it to come in. The faith and hope that I have right now is like seeing that note on my door (Godd's Word) saying come pick it up. Its already been bought, freely given and not its time to pick it up. Right now I'm just in the car, driving to the nearest UPS Store. I pray that when these prayers are answered and the blessing is pour out upon my life that it will uplift the faith of others, that the Lord will lead me to the proper people or place to a blessing back, and that I will remain humble, broken and contrite in Spirit with the favor and blessing of God on my life and decisions and my focus always always always set on Him.
What good is to gain the whole world and lose your soul.
It's not about what I want but what He wants from me. It's not about where I wanna go but rather where He is leading me.
The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delighteth in his way.
-Psalms 37:23
What good is to gain the whole world and lose your soul.
It's not about what I want but what He wants from me. It's not about where I wanna go but rather where He is leading me.
The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delighteth in his way.
-Psalms 37:23
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